My poor rhino, waiting all this time for a pitch from me.  Sorry, luv.  Sigh.  It's been a long, I'll say, tricky summer.  July's unrelenting heat & humidity (two words that give H a bad name) just about did me in.  I have no AC but survived in spite of all attempts to parboil me.  It's one of those weather cycles that happen with or without human carelessness but which corporate food producers will exploit to the extreme, screwing us to the floor of poverty as much as they're able without killing all us golden geese.  This cycle that we (the earth & her children) are in is so difficult to adjust to.  I'd love to find a balance but I keep being pushed off point when really good things happen and then are followed almost immediately by really bad things happening.  I mean this on the personal and global level.  I have to keep reminding myself to remember to focus and meditate and act on the good stuff; recognize the bad stuff, act if I'm able. 

But I admit to a growing belief that nothing I do or don't do will have any effect whatsoever on what corporations have put in to motion--decades ago.  They've had such a long, long time -- by "virtue" of their money and what it can & does purchase -- to stear everything in the direction that will give them the only thing they seek or understand: more.  Hard to believe we've got global wars, poverty, prejudice, bigotry, hatred, famine, dire water & food issues...all due to a relatively small number of people's greed.  That's not paranoia at all, it's simply the current truth of things.  Things do have a way of changing so there's no guarantee that even these greedy ones will stay on top forever.  In fact they probably won't.  It's just so sad that they will have wrecked so much global misery before they fall.  I don't know how that will happen, but it will, maybe in some future where the battles will be out among the stars.  I'd like to rage and beat my fists on some of their heads, but I know that's not the way, that it will only harm me.  I need to meditate, be kind as often as I can remember (and it gets easier the more I practice it, kindness, in the smallest of places), and whistle two songs, alternately: Always Look on The Bright Side of Life; and, Don't Worry be Happy.  Next time this post will have barrells of laughs!  Promise.

There really isn't a poem as lovely as a tree.

Trees are among my very favorite friends in nature.  I tend to think of them as creatures rather than magnificent plants, either way, they're so cool.  I have vivid memories of specific trees all through my life.  The cathedral of elms under which I walked to & from grammar school. The glorious white ash which kept me mesmorized looking at it's upper reaches from our second story window: the bird & squirrel traffic was better than cartoons!  The ancient helmlocks I visited once whose immense size, age & grace humbled and awed me into silence.  Evergreens that I planted then revisited (not that many) years later amazed to see them reaching for the sky far over my head. The marvelous old linden with secret highways that I taught my baby to see and enjoy.  The line of pines, so neat and arranged, planted by my grandfather (for me to enjoy, I am sure :).  Crab apple trees around a parking lot near where I worked under which you could experience the sensation of floating in a delicate world of pink.  The palm trees in tropical climates are so gentle, relaxing and encouraging: bend with the winds and you will survive.  The Ents in Tolkien's Lord of the Rings, are my favorite creations of literature.  They are sad but hopeful, enduring & realistic, slow to anger yet strong & full of purpose when moved.

No one, including yours truly, can duplicate in words or any other art form, the wonder that I feel when consciously aware of a tree. I sense: how deep into the earth its roots cling; the life it supports rentfree; the air it purifies as a part of just being; the shade it provides; inspiration for poets et al; opportunities for climbing or even creating a human house among the nests; glorious colors through all seasons.  In the course of life, all things die.  I have wept to see a familiar tree give up the ghost, become lifeless.  I've wept angry tears when trees are demolished for reasons of greed & ignorance.  All that is part of the picture, the yin/yang of life.  I'll keep appreciating the trees around me, look forward to meeting new ones.  I'm not sure why I've chosen to write about threes today however, if anyone sees these marvelous gifts of earth in a new way because of what I've written here, then I am happy.  Go hug a tree!

Celebrity

Seems to me that Celebrity has become, for so many, a new religion.  The stars, 'real' or imagined, set the tone for their followers, whether the star wishes it so or not.  Reminds me a great deal of THE LIFE OF BRIAN.  'No, no, leave the sandal there!  It has NO meaning whatsoever!'  But the sandal will be enshrined; everyone will be wearing them soon; anyone who says anything against the sandal or the wearing of sandals will be, undoubtedly, stoned (not the more or less pleasant passtime but the hurling of solid pieces of old earth).  I wonder why we can't enjoy the performances of these folk and let the rest be.  Observe rather than obsess over the fashion, accessory (from tiny dogs to, alas, babies), foibles, etc.  Many believe they know these personalities but in fact they only see performances (in whatever venue) and in reality don't know them at all.   I'm not sure I care what they had for breakfast, who they've cheated on and/or with, what car they drive, which drug they're currently being rehabbed for, what they believe in...  No, wait...I'm sure I don't care.  Let us hear the song, see the movie, watch the play, laugh at the joke.  Then let's all go home and gratefully/happily hum, laugh, discuss for a while and let the Celebrity do the same.

Too many words...

It's March. The winter has been extraordinarily mild and this month unbelieveably warm.  I have begun to exhale. Thank you universe!  I really needed a mild winter and early spring this season. 

Recently I've had the feeling that there are entirely too many words flying around; words of encouragement; words to tell you how to (fill in the blank, anything from laying bathroom tiles to getting touch with your higher self); words of warning; words of enlightenment and on and on.  And here I am putting more words out there.  Ha!  Oh well, we communicate through words...although I'm not sure that what appears in texting can yet be considered words, but that's for another day.  I get emails and realmails from Hay House, Oprah, Wayne Dyer, Sounds True, Tiny Buddha, healing centers, hopeful centers...  I'm not complainging. I've signed up for (most of) them and I appreciate the inclination to help in all sorts of ways and many of the words are worthy of consideration.  But I may have temporarily reached a  point of saturation where I cannot take in another useful, helpful, heartfelt word or I'll explode. It would be ugly.  I must take care.  And maybe take a  break from reading these wonderful words. 

I'm the type of person who often thinks that just reading equals doing/knowing/practicing.  It's a bit of twisted thinking, but there you go.  I have no plans to go to the dark side (holds no appeal) but I think I just need to have a time out.  Maybe pick out one site and read it once a week.  Or find a way to get a tiny dose on a daily basis, sort of like spiritual/emotional vitamins.  I crave balance.

Leapin' Lizards...or years...or days...

Could not pass up an opportunity that won't present itself for another four years: writing a post on February 29th.  It will be 2016 before I can do it again and who knows where we all will be.  I know and subscribe to the belief we live in the moment, it's all we truly have.  George Carlin (or Albert Einstein or both) said: Time is Nature's way of preventing everything from happening at once.  And the time we have is now.  We can visit the past to help sort out stuff in our lives & selves; and we can imagine the future but it's an, as yet, intangible thing 'out there'.  The final focus, whether we act on it or not, is now, this moment, the one that deserves and gets all our energy.  February 29th, leap day, is a perfect time to contemplate the nature of time because next year it won't be.  To expand on that thought, each second that passes is there and gone...oops, there goes a few more. Ha, ha, ha...keep laughing, keep believing and cherishing the seconds as they woosh by.  It's life.  It's good...even when it seems so bad.  It's up to us, each one of us, to live in the moment with an ear to the past and an eye on the future and our focus in the now.  Motto for the day:  Have fun and be excelent to each other.

The OwnKnow Syndrome. You or a Loved One May Have It. Take Care.

If there isn't something called the OwnKnow Syndrome (OKS), there should be.  I must believe I'm not the only soul in the world so afflicted.  The symtoms are thus: overabundance of good intentions; deep and wide curiosity; a tendency to hang out wherever large or small quantities of (real) books are gathered; issues of a personal nature having to do with a wish to achieve certain levels of various kinds of development; a desire to bring order out of chaos; a repeated sense of drowning or, in milder cases, floundering, in a sea of really good advice; having repeated but unrealized 'ah-ha' moments; and finally, the debilitating aspect of this syndrome, the purchase of numerous books & magazines, CDs & DVDs that the OKS sufferer believes contain solutions, ways out of the chaos, DIY for the soul, and these items might actually have just what the OKS sufferer needs, but these potential solutions are never read or listened to or watched.  The syndrome somehow changes the thought process so that the OKS person believes that merely owning these items will impart to them the wisdom or answers or suggested paths or processes that might be within said items.  The books pile up, CDs gather dust, and DVDs go missing while the OKS soul can't figure out why the latest purchase with the fantastic plan didn't work.  I'm thinking of forming an OKS support group. I wonder if there are any books on it.  I'll get back to you.

Winter, your days are numbered!

Two days ago I witnessed thousands of northward bound Canadian snow geese cloud the southern sky as they swooped past a large pond. (They are returning, bless their little honking hearts!)  As they few low over the pond, hundreds more, who'd been lounging in their goosey way, took flight and joined the wave flying over.  It was a cool, crisp day with a bright blue sky and the sounds coming from these feathered travelers made me want to fly away with them, it was so compellingly beautiful.  It's the time of year when the birds of prey are nesting and when we start hearing a few song birds add their lovely voices to the city sounds. We're more than half way through February and the *sun* is with us more & more each day. Mardi Gras is Tuesday! To my mind, it's almost spring!  

I should add here, if I haven't elsewhere, that I do find beauty in the winter months. There's a cold starkness about it that takes you back to basics, yin & yang, black & white.  And there is real beauty to be found there.   It's the cold I could do without; cold that creeps into your bones and just doesn't quit until you're buried under down comforters...or, I guess, just plain buried, but in that case, I wouldn't give a hoot about cold.  I try to keep in mind that since we have exactly one day at a time in which to live, love, laugh, to be less than happy along the way with any of those days is a profound waste.  Would I want to live in a sunnier clime?  I've thought about every time I've visited those kinds of places (California, Florida, Mexico, Arizona) while the midwest was chilling.  But, as tempting as it is to imagine a December in the 70s (oh, that does sound good...sigh), I know it's important for me to be where the seasons' change is so clear; where a time of cold & dark makes the time of warm & light all the more welcome.  However, if tomorrow I was offered an ocean view home on Maui and free flights for my loved ones to visit regularly, I'd say 'Thank You Very Much', take the keys and never look back at cold, dark winter.  So much for the beauty of a midwestern winter.  Did I mention the song birds are returning?

Predictions call for a dusting...

It was crisp & dry this morning when I left for my yoga-for-wimps class.  We went through our poses, had a good laugh (she does laughing yoga sometimes, it's great!) and towards the end I noticed a plow pass by the building.  Excuse me?  I could barely see across the street through the swirling tornadoes of windblown white stuff.  Predictions called for a 'dusting', nothing to worry about.  Yes, I know, don't blame the weather guy or gal, weather is unpredictable.  Then how come they call them predictions?  Oh well, no boots, gym shoes soggy/cold by the time I got to the car; no hat or scarf so the rest of me was getting soggy/cold too.  It was practically whiteout and I swear I could hear little hysterical giggles coming from each flake...perhaps that's why they're called flakes.  There was an errand I had to run before going home so I got to play in the traffic with so many gentle souls (aka idiots) who always manage to forget how to drive in the snow if it's been more than a week since the last fall.  Took care of business, managed NOT to meet any of those souls, and returned home....cold, wet, and in one piece.  That one piece then had to shovel stairs & sidewalk.  Did I mention that I don't particularly care for winter?  Oh, did I?  Nevermind then.

One great thing about winter

Okay,  I'm not a great fan of winter, however there is at least one splendid thing about the season: the night sky!  It's dark earlier and longer so, if it's not cloudy, you can be treated to a glimpse of that awesome expanse of black velvet aglow with silver sparklers. The farther away from city lights you are the more spectacular the sight.  My favorite group of stars: Orion, the Hunter.  It's the first constellation I learned to recognize and is one of the most exuberent, as he stalks across the sky.  He's headed west these nights, so I know our winter visit is almost over.

Wish I know which planets were alligned currently.  I can see several but would love to know their names.  Oh well, they were beautiful sights before they had names.  Yes, winter's night sky is a gift and I am all goosebumpy and grateful.

A Mild Winter is a Good Winter

 February is 25% over. Hallelujah! The end is near. Even with that pesky leap day, March is in view, dimmly...on the horizon, but there it is.  I can take almost anything from here on until we reach the promised land: crocus, jonquil, and my fav, lilac time. Cabin fever?  Maybe, but a mild case and on a decrease in proportion to the increase of daily SUNSHINE.  I don't hate winter, but I don't love it any more.  Not since I was a wee bairn and regularly refused the (third or fourth) parental call to GET IN HERE RIGHT NOW! ignoring the fact that everything I wore was cracking stiff with ice & snow. 

And before you admonish me, I do subscribe to taking one day at a time (no other choice, really); living and appreciating the present moment (some moments more than others); and giving thanks for each new day ('25% over' is a definitely giving thanks).  Yes, yes, I do believe in all that but would find it so much more easy to believe if I were currently on Maui.

namaste

Oh no, I'm getting faster at FreeCell

I realized today that getting faster at FreeCell is not a valid or promising career choice.  Probably not as a  hobby either.  Besting my top time was nice, but I found myself being just too thrilled.  I need to stop, cold turkey.  But will I be able to just walk away from those lovely little flicking cards, all red & black, with the cute little numbers... Oh, snap out of it!  I need to climb a mountain! Or jump out of an airplane!  Run for office!  Write something!  Wait, that last one...I can do that! I rubbed the lamp and,  with a little help from a tech genie, this sight was born, poof!  Today.

In the courtroom of my head, my defense of letting chaos creep up around me, includes being out of work for almost a year.  Not much of a defense, true, so it's good I'm also the judge & jury and have a lot of influence w/re the lawyers....we're all quite sympathetic & understanding so I'm expecting good things to come.